Today I found out one of the most beautiful women I know passed last night. I was heartbroken and was boo hooing and crying! My mom always taught me not to mourn too long as it does nothing to bring the person back but she does give us "30 minutes" to cry, get up and get over it!
As I was finishing sobbing I realized we should be in the habit of cherishing each day and telling the people we know and care about that we love them....
Don't take 1 minute for granted.....
***I will be on vacation until the end of the month, my b'day is next week and I'll be out of the country, will write again later!!****
Friday, August 22, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
WHAT I REFUSE TO DO!
So I got a response on blog tears part 2 asking what keeps me so positive, and to make a SUPER long story short I will say it is from leading a life style that could have been self destructive, the death of people my age that I was super close 2.
I then began a process of changing, and understanding that my thoughts create my words, which create my actions which turn into habits.
More on that later.....lol
Back to the topic, I had to comment about relationships....personally, everyone who knows me knows I DO NOT believe in boyfriends and girlfriends. Not so much the fact of being with someone but the title and the drama associated with it. I do believe in exclusive relationships and depending on where you are in life OPEN relationships...yeah I said it lol but I also said DEPENDS
Back to what I REFUSE TO DO tho....I refuse to invade a man's place b/c we are dating, snoop through his phone/bags/house/car, ask questions about other girls in his life, beg for ANYTHING, call excessively, ring the alarm(like Beyonce), and/or do any harm to him and set him up!
There comes a point when you have to be secure, secure in yourself, secure in what you have to offer, and realize (no matter how much you like the guy) that if he loves and respects you he won't do anything to jeopardize a future with you. As long as you keep your mind on that there's no need to act crazy! Insecurity and jealousy is rooted in fear and why be afraid of someone you're dating?
What goes around comes around, so just relax, stop stressing and enjoy/learn from your relationships.
It's never too late to start fresh!!
I then began a process of changing, and understanding that my thoughts create my words, which create my actions which turn into habits.
More on that later.....lol
Back to the topic, I had to comment about relationships....personally, everyone who knows me knows I DO NOT believe in boyfriends and girlfriends. Not so much the fact of being with someone but the title and the drama associated with it. I do believe in exclusive relationships and depending on where you are in life OPEN relationships...yeah I said it lol but I also said DEPENDS
Back to what I REFUSE TO DO tho....I refuse to invade a man's place b/c we are dating, snoop through his phone/bags/house/car, ask questions about other girls in his life, beg for ANYTHING, call excessively, ring the alarm(like Beyonce), and/or do any harm to him and set him up!
There comes a point when you have to be secure, secure in yourself, secure in what you have to offer, and realize (no matter how much you like the guy) that if he loves and respects you he won't do anything to jeopardize a future with you. As long as you keep your mind on that there's no need to act crazy! Insecurity and jealousy is rooted in fear and why be afraid of someone you're dating?
What goes around comes around, so just relax, stop stressing and enjoy/learn from your relationships.
It's never too late to start fresh!!
Sunday, August 17, 2008
What will you tell your daughter?
As always, last night I was watching the Olympics and have been soaking up all the inspiration they give.
Derra Torres is a 41 year old woman who was seeking gold for swimming. At 41, she is old enough to be most of the girls' mom, she had a baby 2 years ago, but she didn't let that stop her. She worked hard, and with the best of the best training her. She went on to win a silver medal.
She lost by one 1 hundredth of a second!!! I was heart broken that she didn't get gold but when they asked her what she would tell her daughter about the race, she said "You don't have to put an age limit on your dreams"
There is no limit to what you can do, there is NO limit to how old you have to be to do something, and no matter what people say if you believe you can, YOU CAN!!!
Derra Torres is a 41 year old woman who was seeking gold for swimming. At 41, she is old enough to be most of the girls' mom, she had a baby 2 years ago, but she didn't let that stop her. She worked hard, and with the best of the best training her. She went on to win a silver medal.
She lost by one 1 hundredth of a second!!! I was heart broken that she didn't get gold but when they asked her what she would tell her daughter about the race, she said "You don't have to put an age limit on your dreams"
There is no limit to what you can do, there is NO limit to how old you have to be to do something, and no matter what people say if you believe you can, YOU CAN!!!
Friday, August 15, 2008
Whatever you put your mind to....
So I've been watching the Olympics like everyday, and tonight was 1 of the BEST races. Phelps won by 1 1hundredth of a second.
I always love to hear how people said they accomplished their goals and one thing he said dealt with his mind. He said " I think it shows that whatever you put your mind to you really can accomplish" he went on to say " I stayed as positive as possible"..."and I just dream BIG".
My advice, DREAM BIG, STAY POSITIVE, AND STAY FOCUSED WITH YOUR EYES SET ON THE PRIZE!!
All things are possible, the commentators earlier today said Phelp's 8th win would be impossible and "a miracle". The miracle business isn't dead!
I always love to hear how people said they accomplished their goals and one thing he said dealt with his mind. He said " I think it shows that whatever you put your mind to you really can accomplish" he went on to say " I stayed as positive as possible"..."and I just dream BIG".
My advice, DREAM BIG, STAY POSITIVE, AND STAY FOCUSED WITH YOUR EYES SET ON THE PRIZE!!
All things are possible, the commentators earlier today said Phelp's 8th win would be impossible and "a miracle". The miracle business isn't dead!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
You need to ROCK this year ahead!
My friend gave me the cutest gift last December for my house warming in NY. It was a journal and the 1st thing it said was YOU NEED TO ROCK THIS YEAR AHEAD! She cut out a pic of my face, attached it to Rihanna's body and the quote beside it read "This rising star has her feet firmly planted"
I pulled this journal from my luggage today to do some "goal planning" and came up with a great idea that most people wouldn't think to do.
In business, companies do something called a SWOT analysis...it highlights the company's strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats
All too often people don't think to do the same thing for themselves. Once you write down your goals and dreams, you should do an analysis to figure out where time, $ and energy has been wasted.
When you write things down and keep them where you can see them you will remain focused.
This way you won't make the same mistakes and your dreams and goals will come true a little easier!!
I pulled this journal from my luggage today to do some "goal planning" and came up with a great idea that most people wouldn't think to do.
In business, companies do something called a SWOT analysis...it highlights the company's strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats
All too often people don't think to do the same thing for themselves. Once you write down your goals and dreams, you should do an analysis to figure out where time, $ and energy has been wasted.
When you write things down and keep them where you can see them you will remain focused.
This way you won't make the same mistakes and your dreams and goals will come true a little easier!!
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Going for the gold!!
I've been watching the Olympics and the most exciting stories are those of the underdogs!
One thing I've taken away from what I've seen so far is that you must remain positive and never quit!
Raj, one of the guys on the USA gymnast team, said (about medalling and defeating the odds) "This is what happens when you never give up!"
Another breakout story was that of Boukpeti, a man who won the bronze for white water rafting and the 1st medal EVER for Togo. The commentators were speaking about him during the replays and said "He had to have visions of greatness in his head"
My words to you, drawn from this, is to NEVER GIVE UP and ALWAYS have visions of greatness in your mind when it comes to your dreams and your life!!
<3 Chan
One thing I've taken away from what I've seen so far is that you must remain positive and never quit!
Raj, one of the guys on the USA gymnast team, said (about medalling and defeating the odds) "This is what happens when you never give up!"
Another breakout story was that of Boukpeti, a man who won the bronze for white water rafting and the 1st medal EVER for Togo. The commentators were speaking about him during the replays and said "He had to have visions of greatness in his head"
My words to you, drawn from this, is to NEVER GIVE UP and ALWAYS have visions of greatness in your mind when it comes to your dreams and your life!!
<3 Chan
Sunday, August 10, 2008
You must be really blessed....
I was at my 1st motivational speaking engagement last month and the young lady helping with the seminar was speaking to me about my life and how it seemed that some things were falling into place effortlessly.
She said you must be a really good person because you sure are getting blessed.
I thought about what she said and realized the blessings she was speaking of were simply me being kind to my neighbors and respecting people who society would look on as "low income" or "beneath standards". Those people who I view JUST LIKE ME, ended up helping me and being a major resource sent from THE SOURCE.
One thing I try to remember is to be nice to everyone because you never know when you could be hosting the prescence of an angel!
It's true:)
Be kind to everyone and see the gifts you receive in life.
She said you must be a really good person because you sure are getting blessed.
I thought about what she said and realized the blessings she was speaking of were simply me being kind to my neighbors and respecting people who society would look on as "low income" or "beneath standards". Those people who I view JUST LIKE ME, ended up helping me and being a major resource sent from THE SOURCE.
One thing I try to remember is to be nice to everyone because you never know when you could be hosting the prescence of an angel!
It's true:)
Be kind to everyone and see the gifts you receive in life.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Encouraging Words....
I've been doing this blog a few days now, and unlike my myspace blog. I have only like 2 comments...lol
For me a word of encouragement or just knowing someone read my blog keeps me going and yesterday I received that ( the comment on blog tears part2)
If you see someone on point, doing a good job or just being a good example period let them know it
You never know how far your words can go and how important your encouragement can be to them in their life
Send out positive energy and positive things will come back to you
Thanks anonymous for your comment yesterday..it encouraged me to write today:)
Love,
Chan
For me a word of encouragement or just knowing someone read my blog keeps me going and yesterday I received that ( the comment on blog tears part2)
If you see someone on point, doing a good job or just being a good example period let them know it
You never know how far your words can go and how important your encouragement can be to them in their life
Send out positive energy and positive things will come back to you
Thanks anonymous for your comment yesterday..it encouraged me to write today:)
Love,
Chan
Thursday, August 7, 2008
BLOG TEARS PART 2
Okay I remembered where I was going now...okay so this guy was my dream (I think I'm throwing up in my mouth right now for being mushy lol)
My point was...when you really love someone and you are honest in your relationship with them. And it ends for reasons that are beyond your control. LET THEM GO!
I loved him YES was IN LOVE too, but at the end of the day I had to realize I am a target with an aim. My aim was pre-destined before I got here and my feelings can't get in the way, and he can't get in the way and my EMOTIONS can't get in the way either. I had to CONTROL MYSELF and keep it movin...
Like T.I said "don't be a groupie, keep it movin" because honestly and again quoting T.I "you don't know me"
Why does he not know me and why may your ex or whatever not really know you?
Because if the person really realized how good you were and all the things you did behind the scenes (fasting for them, prayin, cookin, cleantin--sayin like Madea lol) they would still be there and if they aren't it's THEIR loss
You def shouldn't be the one crying! And I know it takes time to get over it so you got 30 minutes to cry it out, talk it out, write that person a letter if it makes you feel better and then GET OVER IT
Because time is precious and there is none to waste on someone who ain't thinkin bout you
Stay focused and watch your dreams come true;)
My point was...when you really love someone and you are honest in your relationship with them. And it ends for reasons that are beyond your control. LET THEM GO!
I loved him YES was IN LOVE too, but at the end of the day I had to realize I am a target with an aim. My aim was pre-destined before I got here and my feelings can't get in the way, and he can't get in the way and my EMOTIONS can't get in the way either. I had to CONTROL MYSELF and keep it movin...
Like T.I said "don't be a groupie, keep it movin" because honestly and again quoting T.I "you don't know me"
Why does he not know me and why may your ex or whatever not really know you?
Because if the person really realized how good you were and all the things you did behind the scenes (fasting for them, prayin, cookin, cleantin--sayin like Madea lol) they would still be there and if they aren't it's THEIR loss
You def shouldn't be the one crying! And I know it takes time to get over it so you got 30 minutes to cry it out, talk it out, write that person a letter if it makes you feel better and then GET OVER IT
Because time is precious and there is none to waste on someone who ain't thinkin bout you
Stay focused and watch your dreams come true;)
Blog tears (b/c I won't cry over this)
I had this guy I was with who was my DREAM GUY! I mean the 1st time I saw him I was so enamored I had to call my mom and tell her about this mystery guy who was SO FINE!
Lol, long story short he ended up being a DOG, played the hell out of me and then came back into my life years later as a new man with a refurbished spirit.
I don't believe in re-dos but because we were never officially together when we dated I restarted a friendship with him that eventually turned into a romantic, with a future, relationship.
At the beginning of the friendship I didn't really like him at all! But he grew on me...he respected me, he kept me uplifted and edified. He encouraged me to pursue my dreams, we were on the same page spiritually, and it seemed like FINALLY I could breathe and I was SECURE. Secure in myself and secure in the relationship
Long story short things started to get ROCKY and as with any relationship these are the tests and trials that make the foundation stronger.
In our case, due to a lack of communication and my lack of schedule @ the time(which kept me at home bored thinking of only him) tore a ridge in our fairytale and ultimately broke us up.
He didn't call, didn't text and didn't respond to anything....I got a random text from him after not talking for a few days and he apologized and said that there were heartbreaking things going on in his life that he didn't want to talk about
Being home alone AGAIN I started to wonder.....did he get a girl pregnant before me and just find out? Does he have AIDS? Is his career over due to injury? Is he broke? Does he have a terminal illness that will kill him? Does he have an STD?
And after pondering every terrible cause for him to retreat I asked myself if I would stand by him if any of those answers to my questions were YES and I realized I would....
if I knew he was going to die in 4 months I would still stay, if he had AIDS I would still marry him and if he was broke then I'd get another job to help..
That's when I realized I truly loved someone and it wasn't circumstantial, he was my happy place. No matter what type of drama was going on when I talked to him OR talked about him my mind would be at ease.....and I felt SAFE and relaxed
Idk why I wrote this or where I was going I'll finish later lol
Lol, long story short he ended up being a DOG, played the hell out of me and then came back into my life years later as a new man with a refurbished spirit.
I don't believe in re-dos but because we were never officially together when we dated I restarted a friendship with him that eventually turned into a romantic, with a future, relationship.
At the beginning of the friendship I didn't really like him at all! But he grew on me...he respected me, he kept me uplifted and edified. He encouraged me to pursue my dreams, we were on the same page spiritually, and it seemed like FINALLY I could breathe and I was SECURE. Secure in myself and secure in the relationship
Long story short things started to get ROCKY and as with any relationship these are the tests and trials that make the foundation stronger.
In our case, due to a lack of communication and my lack of schedule @ the time(which kept me at home bored thinking of only him) tore a ridge in our fairytale and ultimately broke us up.
He didn't call, didn't text and didn't respond to anything....I got a random text from him after not talking for a few days and he apologized and said that there were heartbreaking things going on in his life that he didn't want to talk about
Being home alone AGAIN I started to wonder.....did he get a girl pregnant before me and just find out? Does he have AIDS? Is his career over due to injury? Is he broke? Does he have a terminal illness that will kill him? Does he have an STD?
And after pondering every terrible cause for him to retreat I asked myself if I would stand by him if any of those answers to my questions were YES and I realized I would....
if I knew he was going to die in 4 months I would still stay, if he had AIDS I would still marry him and if he was broke then I'd get another job to help..
That's when I realized I truly loved someone and it wasn't circumstantial, he was my happy place. No matter what type of drama was going on when I talked to him OR talked about him my mind would be at ease.....and I felt SAFE and relaxed
Idk why I wrote this or where I was going I'll finish later lol
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
It's Not About You!!
What are you thinking about right now?
What consumes the majority of your thoughts on a daily basis? Are you focused and on task? Are your thoughts in line with your goals?
Or are you distracted?
I read on a facebook friends' status that a man distracted is a man defeated.
When I thought about this, I realized it's true.
There comes a point in your life when you realize it's not all about you! It's about fulfilling your destiny and your purpose for being here
So stop dwelling on the past, stop thinkin about that guy/girl that you love that won't talk to you, stop fantasizing about someone else's life and FULFILL YOUR PURPOSE!!!!!
It's not that hard if you just try!
Love yall,
ChanAnd
What consumes the majority of your thoughts on a daily basis? Are you focused and on task? Are your thoughts in line with your goals?
Or are you distracted?
I read on a facebook friends' status that a man distracted is a man defeated.
When I thought about this, I realized it's true.
There comes a point in your life when you realize it's not all about you! It's about fulfilling your destiny and your purpose for being here
So stop dwelling on the past, stop thinkin about that guy/girl that you love that won't talk to you, stop fantasizing about someone else's life and FULFILL YOUR PURPOSE!!!!!
It's not that hard if you just try!
Love yall,
ChanAnd
Monday, August 4, 2008
Stayin Alive!
So many people feel like there's nothing left for them to do..and that their life isn't worth a dime
But in the grave lies some of the most potential for greatness never achieved!
As long as you have a pulse and can breath there is something you can do!!
We are fortunate to be here and free to do what we dream!
Dream big and don't give up!!
You can do it!!
--ChanAnd
But in the grave lies some of the most potential for greatness never achieved!
As long as you have a pulse and can breath there is something you can do!!
We are fortunate to be here and free to do what we dream!
Dream big and don't give up!!
You can do it!!
--ChanAnd
Personal Business
Usually when I write I try not to get too touchy but I feel this post may help someone out there missing someone or waiting on that significant other to come around.
My mom always told me to let go when it comes to relationships. Especially when it comes to guys who want to leave, cheat, act strange or just don't call at all.
A beautiful friend of mine has never had a bf and is still a virgin and couldn't understand why guys would play games...EVER!
I thought about this and what my mom taught me also and came to the conclusion that guys will only allow you to do what you let them.
Meaning, if you let him treat you like dirt, if you let him just use you for sex, and if you let him cheat/beat you IT WILL CONTINUE
Look in the mirror! Write down all the great qualities and things you have to offer. You deserve the best and don't let that no good guy consume your thoughts and ultimately DISTRACT YOU from fulfilling your destiny and seeing your dreams come true. If he did nothing wrong and it's meant to be he'll be back!
Everyone around you may seem to be in love and so happy, but things aren't always what they seem. You were made to fulfill your purpose and no one else's.
Stay positive and keep moving forward. Expect the best and it will come to you!
XoXo,
ChanAnd
My mom always told me to let go when it comes to relationships. Especially when it comes to guys who want to leave, cheat, act strange or just don't call at all.
A beautiful friend of mine has never had a bf and is still a virgin and couldn't understand why guys would play games...EVER!
I thought about this and what my mom taught me also and came to the conclusion that guys will only allow you to do what you let them.
Meaning, if you let him treat you like dirt, if you let him just use you for sex, and if you let him cheat/beat you IT WILL CONTINUE
Look in the mirror! Write down all the great qualities and things you have to offer. You deserve the best and don't let that no good guy consume your thoughts and ultimately DISTRACT YOU from fulfilling your destiny and seeing your dreams come true. If he did nothing wrong and it's meant to be he'll be back!
Everyone around you may seem to be in love and so happy, but things aren't always what they seem. You were made to fulfill your purpose and no one else's.
Stay positive and keep moving forward. Expect the best and it will come to you!
XoXo,
ChanAnd
Sunday, August 3, 2008
I saw you in the future.....
"I saw you in the future and you look a lot better than you do now"
Sometimes things get really hard, and we have the tendency to cry, kick, wish and pray for things that, when it's all said and done we realize we just WANT instead of NEED. If you are PATIENT the RIGHT thing that will fulfill your dreams and be HELPFUL and BENEFICIAL will come along:)
The thing to realize is its ALREADY done and whether you let your obstacle stop you or not determines whether or not you get what your heart desires and what is right FOR YOU (not your friend, not your sister and not even that person you admire!)
The seeds you plant will create a harvest. If you keep working hard and doing your best, you'll have a crop of the BEST!!If you keep lying and being deceitful you'll have a whole crop of lies and deceit!!
Only you decide, but don't give up while doing good....in due season, the harvest of greatness will come. And it'll BLOW YOUR MIND!!You'll come out brighter, better, wiser and much better looking!
Love you all,
ChanAnd
P.S.-Don't be afraid to let go of who you were in order to become who you WILL BE! The storm is over now, the pain and tears are gone, success is on YOUR way!Speak it into your life, do the work as best you can and watch your words manifest!What starts on the inside will show on the outside!!!
Sometimes things get really hard, and we have the tendency to cry, kick, wish and pray for things that, when it's all said and done we realize we just WANT instead of NEED. If you are PATIENT the RIGHT thing that will fulfill your dreams and be HELPFUL and BENEFICIAL will come along:)
The thing to realize is its ALREADY done and whether you let your obstacle stop you or not determines whether or not you get what your heart desires and what is right FOR YOU (not your friend, not your sister and not even that person you admire!)
The seeds you plant will create a harvest. If you keep working hard and doing your best, you'll have a crop of the BEST!!If you keep lying and being deceitful you'll have a whole crop of lies and deceit!!
Only you decide, but don't give up while doing good....in due season, the harvest of greatness will come. And it'll BLOW YOUR MIND!!You'll come out brighter, better, wiser and much better looking!
Love you all,
ChanAnd
P.S.-Don't be afraid to let go of who you were in order to become who you WILL BE! The storm is over now, the pain and tears are gone, success is on YOUR way!Speak it into your life, do the work as best you can and watch your words manifest!What starts on the inside will show on the outside!!!
Everything I’m not makes me everything I am!!
One thing I love about my hometown of Memphis is the confidence level of the women here no matter how they look they are BEAUTIFUL and you CAN NOT tell them otherwise.
ACCEPTANCE should be at the top of your list...mostly when I write I speak of how to look at others BUT look at your self and love EVERYTHING about you and know that what you have to offer should NEVER be compromised.
If there are things you don't like about yourself change them for the better BUT only for you and no one else!!
Sound selfish? No, nowadays too many people rely on the validation of others when if they'd just look in the mirror and realize who they are there would be no room for low self esteem, fear, hate, jealousy or insecurities!!
Love you all,
ChanAnd
ACCEPTANCE should be at the top of your list...mostly when I write I speak of how to look at others BUT look at your self and love EVERYTHING about you and know that what you have to offer should NEVER be compromised.
If there are things you don't like about yourself change them for the better BUT only for you and no one else!!
Sound selfish? No, nowadays too many people rely on the validation of others when if they'd just look in the mirror and realize who they are there would be no room for low self esteem, fear, hate, jealousy or insecurities!!
Love you all,
ChanAnd
What’s your number?
It was January 7th and me hating the DMV like I do I waited until the last minute to get my licensed renewed in Memphis before returning to my new home in NY.
They gave me my number...69 it was about 1:30...
2:30 came around and I was still sitting there...3:30...4:00 here we go I hear people complaining groaning..everyone asking "What's your number?' "What's your number?"...I was in no rush, I knew my number would eventually be called so instead of moaning and complaining I remained calm and kept myself occupied.
All of a sudden here came numbers 60, 61, 62 all these people left, they got tired of waiting, they QUIT....63, 64, 65.
65 was there but the number's kept rolling and then it was MY TURN.
When things get hard and it seems like you've been waiting toooo long don't give up because you could be next up. If you leave you might miss what you'd been waiting for all along.
Your number WILL be called!
*Glad I waited*
Love you guys,
ChanAnd
They gave me my number...69 it was about 1:30...
2:30 came around and I was still sitting there...3:30...4:00 here we go I hear people complaining groaning..everyone asking "What's your number?' "What's your number?"...I was in no rush, I knew my number would eventually be called so instead of moaning and complaining I remained calm and kept myself occupied.
All of a sudden here came numbers 60, 61, 62 all these people left, they got tired of waiting, they QUIT....63, 64, 65.
65 was there but the number's kept rolling and then it was MY TURN.
When things get hard and it seems like you've been waiting toooo long don't give up because you could be next up. If you leave you might miss what you'd been waiting for all along.
Your number WILL be called!
*Glad I waited*
Love you guys,
ChanAnd
1st Post!!!
I am excited to write my 1st blog outside of myspace:) I generate over 12,000 readers on myspace and wanted to share some of my writings with the world outside of "the space". I hope you enjoy these posts and feel free to comment. Feedback keeps me going!!
About me, I am a model, realtor, motivational speaker and entrepreneur. I believe there are NO LIMITS! And with the proper education you can learn how to do anything and defeat all odds! The words I live by were given to me by a friend the other month, "Don't let anyone tell you you can't do something ".
**For my veteran readers from myspace I know the 1st posts you've already read I will do my best to post new things in the midst of switching blogs from myspace;)
About me, I am a model, realtor, motivational speaker and entrepreneur. I believe there are NO LIMITS! And with the proper education you can learn how to do anything and defeat all odds! The words I live by were given to me by a friend the other month, "Don't let anyone tell you you can't do something ".
**For my veteran readers from myspace I know the 1st posts you've already read I will do my best to post new things in the midst of switching blogs from myspace;)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)